Thursday, August 6, 2009

LEFT FIELD



So far summer has been a bit cool in Michigan. Fear not, however, because the The Left Field staff is doing what it can to warm this place up. We may not be able to do anything about the actual weather but we can interview people who live in warmer climates and that's why our guest for this installment of Left Field is Assistant Pastor and youth director at St. Mark Lutheran Church in heat blistering Conroe, Texas.

There were over 800 young men and women who attended SOLA in Grand Rapids. Are you surprised by the turnout? We actually had 904 youth, pastors, and counsellors at SOLA Grand Rapids. We are always pleasantly surprised at what the Lord does. We had originally planned for the Grand Rapids conference to have over 1000 youth, but Calvin College had to take their main theater, which would’ve served as our chapel, offline for that week. This put us in the campus Chapel, which really was an unbelievable experience. While I'm sorry that we had to turn some groups away, I'm really really glad we were in the Chapel.

Does it seem a bit odd that this summer’s HT conference, SOLA was held on Calvin College’s campus? Nope. We've had conferences at Roman Catholic, Methodist, Presbyterian, and even non-denominational universities and chapels. When we arrive at a college, that campus becomes Lutheran for a week. And besides, at Calvin College, we were able to make all those predestination jokes!

The LCMS National Youth Gathering occurs once every three years. HT’s conferences occur every summer. Other than frequency, what differences exist between the two? I don't know about making comparisons with the NYG, I can only say that Higher Things serves a niche group of congregations that want to have the historic liturgy and substantial catechises for their youth. We challenge youth to “Dare to be Lutheran” and they never fail to amaze us!

My son came back from SOLA and has been telling stories about the conference since he returned. Why isn’t your HT fantasy baseball team dominating the league? First of all, I’d like to point out that I've won HT fantasy football two years in a row. Back to back! My fantasy baseball teams always fade during conferences when I seem to be a bit busy. There's still a bit of baseball left to play this season, but if I were a betting man, I'd bet on Pastor Zill to win this year.

Which disciple would have the most interesting tweets on Twitter? St. Matthias. I want to know what the Lord did through Him! Don't you?

You are the Assistant Pastor and youth director at St. Mark Lutheran Church in Conroe, Texas. For those interested in pursuing youth ministry as a vocation, what should they know? I didn't know a thing about youth ministry when I got here. Not a thing! The most important thing to do is to remember that it's the WORD that saves young people (James 1:21, 1 Tim. 4:16).

Next year’s HT’s conference, GIVEN will be in Logan, Utah and Memphis, Tennessee. How do you pick the locations for these conferences? We use a map, some darts, and a blindfold (grin). After we repair the holes in my wall, we try to spread the conferences throughout different regions of the United States to give more young people an opportunity to attend a Higher Things conference. I would expect that in a few years, we would start repeating sites again.

Excluding God’s Holy Word, what one book should be read by every student at some point during the high school years? Luther's Large Catechism.

What’s your favorite hymn? Why? I love teaching hymns to young people and to my congregation. After I became a Lutheran, my favorite hymn was “All Glory, Laud, and Honor” (LSB 442). Now, my favorite hymn changes based upon the season and the year! It would have to be between “Lo, He comes with Clouds Descending” (LSB 336) or “Of the Father's Love Begotten,” (LSB 384) or “Oh Love, How Deep,” (LSB 544) or “Christ Jesus Lay in Death’s Strong Bands” (LSB 458), and “Our Paschal Lamb” (LSB 473). Right now, I'm really jazzed about the Given conference hymn, “O God, O Lord of Heav'n and Earth” (LSB 834) by Martin Franzmann. I love any hymn that is supposedly too hard to sing!

As a high school English teacher, I want my students to treasure good literature: Hamlet, Huck Finn, Crime and Punishment, The Book Thief, “Once More to the Lake” et al. What literary treasure were you forced to read, in either high school, college or even the seminary, and just never enjoyed? Never enjoyed? I never enjoyed Count of Monte Cristo. I absolutely love Shakespeare.

Pop Flies:

LSU or UofM football? Geaux Tigers! I grew up five minutes from LSU. I used to do my older brother's chores to get his football tickets from him. I graduated from LSU in 1996.
LSU football or the CWS champions LSU baseball? I would trade six LSU baseball champions for another LSU football championship. Yet, I have all six of the LSU championship baseball and both football championship front pages from the Baton Rouge Newspaper framed in my study. There's hardly any room for Jesus pictures. Does that make me an idol worshiper? (grin)
The Spirituality of the Cross by Gene Veith or Why I am a Lutheran by Daniel Preus? The Spirituality of the Cross.
San Antonio or Grand Rapids? GRRRRRR! That's really not fair. I'm not Going to Reveal that to you! I'll Get in tRouble! I can only Give you a Really small hint.
Law or Gospel? The Gospel (after the Law has been properly preached)!
The Tour de France or the annual LSU/Florida grid-iron grudge match? LSU vs. anyone. A better question would be, “The Tour de France” or “LSU losing to Florida.” That would be a push.
Free-range chicken or the 6-piece McNugget meal? I've never had free-range chicken!
Star Wars or Star Trek? BOTH! That makes me a geek, right?
Windows or Linux? Linux so much that I finally bought a Mac. It was really sad when the most-read post on my blog was a how-to-guide on how to install Linux on my Dell!
Nolan Ryan or Stan Musial? “Stan the Man” was my father's favorite player.
Blogs or Twitter? Twitter! Micro-blogging is so much easier than actual blogging.

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Eliot Arnold (Tim Allen) - A divorced man, fired from his job at the Miami Herald and running a struggling advertising agency. His teenage son Matt thinks he is a dork
Anna Herk (Rene Russo) - Jenny's devoted mother and the reluctant wife of Arthur (even though she thinks he's an idiot). She becomes immediately attracted to Eliot, upon meeting him
Arthur Herk (Stanley Tucci) - A rude and obnoxious man who is currently being marked for death for embezzling from his company
Matt Arnold (Ben Foster) - Eliot's son and the "killer" of Jenny. He also develops a crush on her.
Jenny Herk (Zooey Deschanel) - Anna's daughter and a classmate of Matt. She is also Matt's target in the school's game "Killer".

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Супермаркет. Только зашёл в зал. Сзади окрик охранника - «Молодой
человек!!! ».
Оглядываюсь. Сразу у входа, возле ящиков с водкой, двое подростков,
16-17 лет.
Взяли большой пузырь и пошли дальше в зал.
Значит сзади им окрик охранника - «Молодой человек!!! »
И охранник идёт к тому что водку держит.
Сразу подумал — молодец! Блюдёт службу!
Но как не посмотреть на бесплатный цирк?
Но...
Я даже не мог представить, что дальше будет.
Итак.
Окрик охранника - «Молодой человек!!! »
Подходит.
«Вы ценник видели? »
Это водка акционная. Возьмёте две, третья бесплато.
У меня падает челюсть.
Но и это не всё. Знаете ответ?
Один посмотрел на другого и произнёс «А на ху... нам столько водки? »

p.s. если понравилось пиши в лс, буду радовать еще)

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Зашла в уголок за крыльцом, чтобы ветер не мешал прикуривать, и тут
прямо на тротуар, прямо на меня наметившись, заезжает на приличной
скорости мужик на мотороллере. Живописный такой: пузико приличное,
длиннющие полуседые волосы собраны в хвост, мятая майка и шорты а-ля
семейные трусы.
Т. к. выражения его лица было не видно за шлемом, я предпочла на всякий
случай, всем своим видом выказывая опасения, сделать шаг назад,
практически коснувшись лопатками стены...
Тут мужик слазит со своего пепелаца, снимает шлем, под которым
обнаруживается ослепительная улыбка, и говорит:
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кроме как её переехать!..

p.s. чёрный юмор) если понравится буду радовать еще

Anonymous said...

Если женщина плачет. Памятка мужчинам.

1. Первым делом, попытайтесь выяснить, чья это плачет женщина. Когда женщина чья-то, утешать ее небезопасно. Если женщина ничья, возьмите ее себе. Теперь, если она продолжит плакать, то будет совершенно понятно, что это от счастья.

2. Когда плачет ваша личная женщина, не оставляйте ее одну. А то вокруг все только и думают, что она ничья. Будьте к ней максимально близки и внимательны. Отойдите не дальше, чем на расстояние, где ее голос уже не будет слышен, и не выпускайте из виду - используйте бинокль.

3. Вопросы, которые нельзя задавать женщинам в слезах:
"Чего ты хочешь?"
"Кто виноват?"
"Что делать?"
Ответ на первый вопрос больно ударит по кошельку, а на два последних - по самолюбию.

4. В ответ на женские слезы не надо никуда бежать. Не надо никого спасать. Не надо никого наказывать. Обязательно окажется, что спасать и наказывать надо было совершенно наоборот.

5. Практика дарить печальным женщинам подарки - порочна. Лучше подайте пачку носовых платочков. Запомните, подарки надо дарить только веселым женщинам. Так вырабатывается полезный условный рефлекс и установка на приятный характер.

з.ы. как просили в лс, очередной выпуск юмор истории)

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