I'm not sure what made me laugh more, the image of a flailing, falling 600-pound car plummeting from the skies, the sound it must have made when it hit the car's hood, the instant mini-burgers created upon impact or the author's use of words throughout the article. When the reporter used "utterly" to set up the quote, he must have chuckled. Ahhhh, the power of words. Now, I'm sure there would have been an outcry of sympathy if, instead of a free-falling bovine, a dog crashed onto the car. Fault may have targeted the driver if it was a manatee. Man's inhumanity to animal might have been front page news if a wandering baby seal met its demise in this manner. PETA might have pressured the auto industry to create external air-bags to minimize such future horrors.
That's why I'm thankful it was only a side of beef (make that sides of beef) that decimated the van's hood.
Oh, and I'm very thankful nobody was hurt. Internet video whispers hint there may be cinematic visuals of this event. I bet that's even funnier.